I don't deal with most
Because of the hand I was dealt
It's made me guarded, protective
Of everything I own
Everything I have attained
It all started when my feelings were exposed
I pictured a perfect world with just me and her
Yet, she invited others and cracked my heart
No matter...
Because it was still intact
On to the next...
Dark days came
Until beauty shined light on
My ugly situation
She just walked past me and
Changed my world
Turned it upside down
And me inside out
Showing feelings again
Exposed like a crab with no shell
After she was done
Taking everything I had
That's all that was left
MY heart was struck again
And even more brutal attack
As she walked away with
Who was my best friend
Yet, I continued...
MY next eye catcher wanted
For better or for worse
Things got better for me
And two weeks later got worse
She always wanted to argue
Disrupt my smooth cool vibe
I gave off so easily
She was determined to have her way
I begged, I pleaded
To come to a compromise
As I felt the walls of my heart fogging up
With pressure about to shatter
She laughed, kissed me...
And said it's over
I felt the internal bleeding instantly
No tourniquet necessary
It was too late....
I hovered over the sink
In my bathroom as the
Blood and tears dripped
From my mouth
A flowing river of despair and anger
Shards of by heart ripping
My esophagus as I regurgitated them
I thought I was dead for sure
When my eyes closed after
Collapsing on my bathroom floor
Then they were opened once more
Now, I see black and white
I can; t smile even if I try
I try to feel but I cannot
Silence is my solace
Pain I feel no more
It's as if I am a zombie
Waiting to commit suicide
To be alive again by
Killing myself and awakening
Somewhere else
Many ask...
What happened to you?
Why are you like this?
The only thing I can tell them is...
Go check the bucket of blood
Most will never understand
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem