City On The Horizon Poem by Chanja Cassini de Thury

City on the horizon
Forest ablaze
I lost it all
In a fireball and haze
I’m breathing in the smoke
I cry
I start to choke
On my anger and disappointment
The moneys gone
And the family went
Only photos
Keep their memories alive
If only, if only
I didn’t survive
I didn’t carry on their mark
Their blood
Their lies
Gone in a wisp of a spark
I never did all I could
And all I used to know, and have
Already died
They relied on me
And I regret
I haven’t begun to apologize yet
They hate me
I’m salt on their tongue
But I can’t help it
What’s done…. is done
I’ve blistered their hands with my touch
I’ve bashed their heads with my truth
I wish I didn’t cry so much
And I wish I never bothered you
Never knew your smile
Or your laugh
But that’s all I want back
If only the photos
Could help
And not prick like tacks
But I hate myself
So much more than you
The cities dead,
And so are you
I wish I could only perish too
Under this smoke
Under this dread
Under my tacit, latent sins
But I know, now
That you can never
And I mean never
Change what happen then
So I live
Like not before
I live
And I explore
The sorrow I cause
I shouldn’t have missed a beat
There’s no room for flaws
Or crying
You’re a disgrace
Hell holds everything
And angels hold no grace
My world is shattered
And im wrecked inside
Nothing else mattered
When I lied, and denied
But you knew it was me the whole time….
You could see from my trembles
And bloodshot eyes
And now im held on by shackles
Bent and broken
Crushed by your pain
I can only cry, “I’m sorry” over and over again
But it’s no use
Ill only induce
The noose
That’s suits me
I can’t do this anymore
I cant save anyone
But to relinquish my blame, and actions
I can preach on about the name
The dreadful, dreadful name of
The once beautiful
Now troubled
Race that’s run
City
On the
Horizon…