Dad, Thanks Poem by Desiree Whitamore

My dad always told me to follow my dreams.
And that I could be anyone I wanted to be.
But now I wonder if it was just a play.
Now maybe I think it was just something he said just to say.
He never went out and became what HE wanted to be.
Always claiming he stayed because of me.
I’ve always wondered why he put that on ME.
Why would he give his own daughter such a big responsibility.
Out of my all years I’ve learned to be strong.
I took my dad for granted and before I knew it he was gone.
And every time I see his face my heart breaks a little.
And I hate that I blame him for putting me in the middle.
I try to blame myself for getting hurt,
but everytime he doesn’t call I know it won’t work
Often I wonder what’s going on in his head.
Then I have to repeat everything I’ve already said.
I’ve had times with him where the ultimatum doesn’t even work,
And after that not talking just makes it worse.
He says he’s glad that I write all this stuff.
But the deeper I go, the harder it is to call his bluff.
I love my dad and I always will.
And he needs to know because of him, my dreams will be fulfilled.
I’ll believe in myself as much as I can.
And to my dad: I love you and thank you again.