Dark Wave Poem by GRANT FRASER

There's a tiredness
unlike any other,
that drives me half along,

And when I turn aside,
or of time, having lived,
and travelled so far between
thought, and life's heartbeat,

Or the momentum of age,
behind us, like a great wave,
surging upwards, further still...

Unlike the panic 40 years
ago, so frightened of the mind,
revealing each aspect of moment
to moment yearnings,

Fluttering like a frail human,
towards the dark,
and no true kind of answers,
to alleviate the inside,

Only death, and all it's ragged ends,
I mean jettisoned off high buildings,
A Gorgon among the black rocks
of the incessant brain,

And living not so easy to do,
drinking oneself on and off
like a light switch,

Getting up at the break of day,
everyday for eternity,
of forgetting the daily script,
the names of specific associates,

Or faces growling along
pitch black alleyways,
"we know you! ",
body like a twig about to break!
just a modicum of terror,

Bar the moments of complete
fascination and equilibrium,
to freeze entirely like a statue,
and feel each moment defined,

A sort of inner knowledge rising,
but never enuf,
everything with a sort of well
kept meaning,
that was all too weird to bear!

With all the beautiful bodies,
summoning your eyeballs!
with little side of the mouth
gesture, until caught in a snare,

That is just a trickle of
what's already past,
never quite ahead of time,
gorging on invisibility,
of life's hidden plight?
(if there is one..) ,

Postscript:

In bed last night,
the succubus came and
sucked my breath,
I strained so hard
my throat constricted,
with soft pink lining
crashing together..

of course I flinched!