Deadlocks Of Loving Poem by Joan Fontanilla Balmania

I will love you no matter how difficult it is to count the exact number of the stars and how difficult it is to catch the Venus and the moon in the photographs

I will love you no matter how hard it is to memorize the periodic table of elements and how hard it is to determine each chemical reactions;
When all the elements collide and loose a single atom;
When all are heated, or frozen, or combined all together

I will love you no matter how afraid I am with spiders;
When these crawling creatures enter my ears and let every hair in my body stands;
Or just have them still on the wall and I can hardly even move

I will love you no matter what incubus will visit me all night
Paralyzing my whole body, suffocating me until I die;
Seven times at night before I sleep; or is it just my hallucinations?

I will love you no matter how problematic it is to solve Math;
When the slope is not determined in a Cartesian plane;
When the triangles have the same sizes but have different measurements of angles; or when there are hundreds of polynomials to add;
Or basically just one plus one equals the two of us;
Us. The x and the y of the axis

I will love you even if the people cannot determine if Jesus is god
or the son of God;
Or how laborious it is for them to understand the Bible;
Or how they curse Him for their problems and for how stupid they are
for not knowing Satan and his works;
Or how dumb they are for now knowing God's name.
Or for absorbing too much traditions in this world

I will love you no matter how many voices I hear;
Or how they tell me to kill myself and forget you and all the people I know;
Or how these drugs are not working;
Or how searing the pain of the blade is;
Or how the tight rope on my neck loose;
Or how the injections make a person rest for only a while

I will love you no matter how culture interferes with gender roles;
Or how a woman cannot pursue a man she loves because of this society

Because I will love you no matter how crazy I could get;
No matter how I wake up in the morning not feeling anything;
Not hating you, yet not loving you; using you but not missing you;
Because sometimes, the brain doesn't know
What the heart really wants to show