Definition Of Grief In Freedom Poem by Katerina Val

Grief
breathing through the loss
and we keep dissolving in the burning tongue
for we have weird thoughts to toss

In the fire where I burned you
You are burnt

You feel the things I need and those I have to say
and you realize it when I am too folded up to breathe
You are fine when I'm free
But you hate it when I really find myself in it

When the loss is about to find it
why are you feeling so opposite
trying deliberately to convince me to not be free?

Mentally ill my love, mentally ill.
that's what you must be

Oh I see, freedom is so dangerous
some poor hide from freedom
so that it cannot find them and tear them
I'll rip out the grasp of time
and I'll rip out the ground
till it accepts to swallow me
so when I ‘ ll be ready to be free
you, and all those things, will feel fine
with it

Will you be fine with it?
I hope you' ll never be

Should I try to escape, lock me back
‘cause out there, it's too frightening for me to stop
So frightening to be
Out there, freedom, touches you with cold sharp hands
hands like scissors and holding weapons that we cannot understand
if you don't die to be free
if you are not tragically thirsty to be
let me
don't touch my hands
forget me, forget it
I burnt you in the fire
the second that I saw
you'll never be enough to be free

So, how do you want me to not be free?
Swallow me, before I dig you in

You say that
you can be so desperately attached to freedom
that you could give your heart for it
but if you had the chance to fly underwater
would you accept it, knowing that you couldn't breathe
would you give away some seconds of life
in order to feel even for some idea of it
that you are for those seconds, free?

If not,
how do you expect me to not desperately want to be free?
Hide me in, before I bury you in me

Let's say you escape from me
Could you give away all your belief
So to be someone else in the place of you
More fast, more unprotected and more free?
What if I don't think so, what if I see
that you are not that close to be ready
to feel free
would you still be in love and in pain with me?

Quickly, hide me back in
before I swallow me

For this, I am asking you
to set me free