Deus In Retriever Poem by Tony Jolley

…And God saw that it was good…
But perhaps it could be better,
So like any a craftsman worth his salt
On his ‘day off’ he was tempted to tinker……


So to that pint-sized brain, he came again,
Focusing all his creator power,
Vowing to beat the ‘Big Blue’ he knew
Would beat Spassky in under an hour.

Never has the world seen such a probability machine
All wrapped in a russet-blonde suit:
Four paws, one wet nose and a waggy tail that shows
She knows that she’s just too damn’ cute.

But what if they knew (as you and I do)
She’s a food-seeking missile inside,
That guides her every action with no hint of distraction
To have her ‘cake’ and yours besides.

That playful look is just a ‘hook’:
A man-trap for the unwary,
For she never misses with her sloppy kisses,
Seduces hearts by being so hairy.

Giving paw’s a sign she aims to dine
‘Pon whatever is there on your plate,
So keep a weather eye on that table top high
Or for your dinner you’ll be too late!