Failed Poem by Kira Williams

i dont know how to do this...
i tried to forget you i really really did,
but when i think of you, i loose my train of thought,
when i close my eyes i can see us kiss,
what i wouldnt give to have you in my arms again,
i would die a thousand deaths iif it brought you back to me
(i know it wouldnt matter cause id be dead) .
but if i did that i feel like you wouldnt even care.
all youve ever done is lie to me,
you said you loved me, now you take it back,
you say you still want me, then you say stay away,
you said you would never leave me, and now youre gone.
what did i do to turn you away?
you can say that youll be there for me, but when the time comes, you wont be seen.
i wish you would make up your mind,
take me or leave me alone,
be in my arms, or get out of my head.
i wish i could be strong and lock my memories away,
but every time i hear your name, or i see your face,
those memories come to life and i cant do anything but suffer.
i wish i could take this fake smile i have plastered on my face off,
but if i do, everyone will se the pain that ive hidden so well,
theyll see that i have tried,
theyll see that i have failed