For Security Purposes... Poem by john coldwell

My call was important, the voice repeatedly said,
For the twenty or so minutes the phone was stuck to my head,
And I was officiously told,
In tones stern and bold,
That I was to be recorded,
For training, and security purposes.

Imagine my delight, now quite late at night,
When I was presented with the choice of five options,
But none suited me,
So I just pressed number three,
And was disconnected, in mysterious circumstances.

I don’t regret the rude word, but I doubt that they heard,
My opinion of the service they offered.
I had ready a mouthful,
That I think would have been helpful,
For their training and security purposes.

Then again, the call was just fine,
Even though nine, nine, nine,
For the burglar’s security purposes!