Given A Proper Title Poem by Kristin Loves You

i sit in my room
and i contemplate
why do they all assume?
i truly am not doing all this out of hate
i just didn't like what i saw
sometimes i try and think what life would be like
if i hadn't just stood and watched in awe
what would happen had i interfered?
would my fear become a flaw?
i tried not to cry
something told me to be strong
i wiped the tears from my eyes
and i somehow kept holding on
i picked up the phone
and somehow managed to dial the number
for a minute in my life i didn't feel alone
suddenly i felt so much braver
that feeling soon left
as did the police with my mom in their care
that was the day i became depressed
the day my tears became more frequent
because she took him back
after all he put us through
never in my life did i think i'd snap
i'd been overdosed
not drugs, drama
after the third time i became used to her doing as she pleased
never once did she keep a promise
and to think, i thought it only affected me
do all things really happen for a reason?
or is that just bullshit like the rest of life?
so many times i thought about leaving
i couldn't find the guts to plan suicide
it would've made things so much easier
in the end things turned out for the better
the thought of blood back then made me queasy
i guess to overcome a fear is better sooner than later
if i ever do get that far
as to ending my life
i hope it's not over something so bizarre
and i really hope it's not with a knife