Habitually Poem by Oluwaseun Oshamiluyi

Habitually
I would've asked your friend for your number
I would've sent that text
I would've looked at you from afar and giggled
I would've stared at your picture all night while I await your reply

Habitually
I would've created scenarios
I would've seen you walking down the alter in my fantasy
I would've wished to wake up everyday to the sound of your breath on my neck
I would've imagined the warmth of your lips
And the touch of your little fingers on my skin

But I guess I'm indifferent about it
Indifferent cause I might give my all and you'll shut me out
I'm scared I might not be enough for you
Or my love might seem too little
The monsters in my head are scared of falling

I'm scared my love might break you just like It did to others
I'm scared you might lose me if you try to get me
I'm scared to wake up one morning and realize that only I had fallen
I'm scared that you'll get bored of me

Habitually
With these indifference I would've said que sera sera
But then I thought;
Isn't that what love is? Being scared, then being brave, because of that one person? "
So I'm gonna try without doubts