I Am Not Able To Say Anything Further, As I Am Gone Once And For All Poem by Bashyam Narayanan

I came to life
With a gentle electrical shock
And a mild tremor
When an egg from my mother’s ovary
Was invaded by my father’s sperm
Thousands of sperms around
Showed respect and withdrew from the race
Allowing me to enjoy buoyancy
In the pool of uterus liquid

I moved slowly onto the wall
Where I settled and started getting nurtured
Through the umbilical chord from my mother
I grew from a cell to mass of flush

It was a great stay in comfort
With watery cushion all around
Most of my organs in their miniature form
Nothing to disturb
Except for those tight embraces
With an emotional outbreak
“Thank you, you are bearing my child”

“Our first child, should be a boy”
A whisper shared in private
Between my parents
I am yet to know as to
Whether I am a boy or girl

“We do not conduct tests
To know the sex (it should have been gender)
Of the fetus” declared a voice
But continued
“As a special case we will in your case”

Every thing was normal for sometime
Suddenly I felt the impact of
Adrenaline that got pumped
Into me through my mother’s blood
I was in discomfort
For long and adrenaline level
Did not come down to my comfortable level

“It is a female.
We need to medically terminate the pregnancy”
Was what I heard in the same voice
That glorified my mother sometime ago
For having borne me
Oh, this is the reason for adrenaline
Now I understood

My discomfort showed no sign of
Abating, in fact, it was growing
Probably my mother being
Emotionally down

Suddenly pierced a sharp knife
And penetrated the tranquil
Watery heaven to cut
The link between me and my mother
And I am out in the glaring light
As a starkly naked flesh of no specific shape
On a kidney tray in a
Irritatingly smelling room

All my comfort gone
And now I was gasping for life
I know I will soon be dead
But I cannot stop wondering
How do these people know not
That I also possess the reactor
Which their mothers have or had
And which housed them for nine months
Shaped them and gifted them
To this world in their full shape

What wrong did I do
To be punished with termination

O God, if at all you can give wisdom
Bless them with that
So that the entire human race
Is not terminated

I am not able to say anything further
As I am gone once and for all