I Can'T Believe Poem by Emily Reid

I can't believe
It's been 8 months
And I still cry when I read
The chats and the letters.
I still cry when i remember
Being held tight because you didn't want to leave,
Not just yet.

I still cry
When I remember you calling me as soon as you got home
Saying you already missed me.
I still cry
When you treat me like one of the guys.
Because I know
That no relationship
Will compare to ours
And no heartache will compare
To mine

Thanks for breaking my heart.
And thanks for the nights i spent awake with a razor blade to my skin wishing you would see how badly I needed you
Just to stay sane.
Just to feel safe.
Instead I hold tight to the flashy hug of the razor
As it pulls at my skin.

And I secretly hope that one day
I'll accidentally cut deep enough to end
All of this.
Because it's too much.
And all your fault.
All your fault I cut
And Tried to kill myself.
All your fault the only other guy I acctually liked
Was a player.
All your fault I set myself up to be hurt.
Because my heart can't be broken
If it hasn't been whole
Since January 15th,2010.