I Cannot Run With You Poem by Danny Ballan

Though it feels so hard the words I say, I’ll stay.
Me gone again in another century of pain,
And you go, be on your way,
Yet this love I have for you will never fade or wane.

On your way quickly go, get lost, be gone
And the shade you left behind will die again,
And the history of the whole wide world will go on
For a choice I could not have made. I wish I were a man.

A big shadow of my tears would cover down all my years
I will live with my constant fears; I will live alone.
Until the last moment my life out of grief shears,
And the last cell in my heart turned into stone.

Go away, and that you must. I cannot run away with you
For my bearings in this world are too heavy to love,
And I am their idol of what’s pure and true;
I am their wings; how can I soar ahead and fly above?

And that poor husband who’s so much in love with me
Could stand the whole world for me without complaints
My heart sinks deep in my chest for it’s either my or his misery
For all his life he honored me, how can I pay him back in shame?

But it is the moments I was with you that only count
And the rest is gone in the big forgotten realm of nothing
Where I will stay as day by day my days you will always haunt
I could see you in my robes, in my hair on my lips into anything.

I know how every cell in me wants us to be together
Such certainty comes once in life and I know I’m certain
That what had started today was meant to last forever
But I shut down all my life and closed the final curtain.

I cannot run away with you. I am destined to be poor
For all the riches of the world would not enrich without you nor
Would all the moments in my loneliness when I’d take the tour
In my memories of those days with you bring me back to life no more.

2012