Sally Nesmith

Rookie (1/5/90 / Savannah Georgia)

I'M Here - Poem by Sally Nesmith

I'm in some dark place here,
don't know where to go....
I can see you,
but only so faint
I walk around here everyday,
but i guess you just don't notice me
Everyday you look around,
and all you yell is 'you promised! '
I ask you what you mean....
but you just lower your head and weep
'you promised, you promised, you promised me! '
I still do not understand
You do not eat
you do not sleep
you do not leave
all you do
is
stare
at a photo
of
me.....


Comments about I'M Here by Sally Nesmith

  • (6/25/2005 2:17:00 AM)


    I like your work very much! (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
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  • (5/29/2005 11:11:00 PM)


    This poem builds up a lot of dramatic tension prior to the conclusion.

    I think the final sentence 'all you do is stare at a photo of me...' would
    be more emphatic if it was not broken up into 6 seperate lines. but rather into 2.

    all you do
    is stare at a photo of me.

    Very good effot.
    (Report) Reply

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Read poems about / on: sleep, dark



Poem Submitted: Sunday, May 29, 2005

Poem Edited: Wednesday, June 1, 2005


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