I Smile - Poem by TM. Anon
As tears fall silently down my cheek
The tears slow and wet
Like his kisses
Passionately and aggressively
We show all our feelings that we've been hiding for one another
& I lay in his bed because I know it is safe
To be near him meant that I was in my sanctuary
All harm could not touch me
I lay in his bed inviting
& he touches me
The soft touches followed by soft words
I was forever in his spell
Who would guess that his lovely spell could be the only thing to break me
I lay in his bed
Tears streaming down my face
& he unknowingly sleeps
I love him still
Even though the place I thought most safe has become the opposite
His lies took away the pleasure
The pleasure of what should have been a special night
Everyday I watch him
I watch him tell lies to someone else not as wise as me
I found out the game
No longer am I a player
"lay in my bed? "
"No sir! "
No longer shall I lay his bed
No longer will those soft words and those soft touches lure me into his trap
I am finished
But am I really finished?
Am I really done with the tears
Am I really done with the hurt
Am I really done with the smiles...
That he once brought
That happy feeling I had when I heard those soft words
Am I really done with him?
The game with my heart is on going
& he feels no shame
he feels no shame knowing that he brought me tears
he feels no shame knowing that he hurt me
& then I just smile
because that is the only thing I can do
The smile eases the pain
The smile makes me feel everything is alright
& everything will be alright
because I smile.
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