Insignificantly Significant Poem by Andrus Cassian

"Bones, muscles, tissues"
Oh please spare me the anatomy
"But listen, these are components you see"
Do you hear what you believe
how on earth do you perceive...this to be the same old story to conceive
receive this hit upon my lips
when kiss the air with the mist of the dialogue I wish to spread
All I require are open ears, I have no need for tongues unsteady, for all anyone speaks is nonsense to me
"And all the sounds you create, I don't care seems to be one of deliberate repetition"
Of course, why should I place opinion and thought into individual matters that hold no significance to me
"For perspective"
What perception could irritation prescribe to me except a massage to my temples cause boy these idiots are frustration ever single one
Why should I care, why should I dare step free of my enclosure to wrap my head around the idea of models, bottles, the celebrity life I never admire
Why should I care, why should I dare pop the very bubble I filled with my very own air of sanctuary
the place I feel safe from the negative effects from this plain of existence where the masses find it endearing to aspire to be counting the amount of their own ribs they can see like it's a contest
All to feel beautiful, all to feel loved
All to feel something than disgusting
"The only negativity I'm surrounded by seems to yours
Open your lowlights
Baby there's highlights
Come out of dark, don't turn out the lights
Life is beautiful
Embrace the positivity"
I envy you, your blind optimism
I envy you, my gosh it is priceless
But my dear what you ask for is expensive
For every shred of optimism I try to reach comes at too high a price
Here's my leg, chop it off at the knee…
Oh you want an arm too
Sorry I can't provide for you
See I already promised it to someone I love too
A mystery, a game of hide and seek
Here's a mirror, should I grab the smoke in here too?
Better yet let me grab a cigarette
I don't smoke I feel like I need to
This snowball effect failure turned into a blizzard, I'm snowed in for winter
a fireplace empty can still provide ashes
In my case, I just fill it with broken dreams
Don't try to persuade me
Positivity does nothing to aid me
"Do you hear that selfishness in your voice
Live for something, live for someone
Strive for the moon, take the stars
You're not a lone planet in your universe
Nothing revolves around you
Others exist, so stop trying to resist if you persist, what would your Mother think of you"
Hold fast your tongue, think carelessly and you'll leave with it in your palms
Words are a dangerous thing so bare yours in your castle behind thick stone walls and fences for I know it the hard way
once they leave, they'll do an about face, draw and attack you like projectiles
Calm them mobile mistakes so don't dare speak of Mother Superior ever again
Mother is proud of me, proud of her son
It won't scar me if she says no
...at least I hope so
Spare me the lines of generosity
I know this world's bigger than me
I am one of grain sand in a desert
a single droplet of water in the ocean
a snowflake in the Arctic
Yet these are MY EYES
my luminescent pearls for me to take part in the scenery surrounding
These are my thoughts, my mind
I'm no mind reader so here let my mouth communicate with ever more failure I exude
So here allow me to walk through life and fail more than I have fingers to learn lessons relentlessly to fail all the more while grabbing this shovel to dig a hole for after I live too long, this is my home
This is the life I spent a century working towards, a hole in the ground
after I forget all that time I spent wondering what it means to be alive
Where is the positivity, where is generosity in that
"Do you want to die? "
I want to be immortal
I want to live
I want to love for lifetimes over
I want to be ideal
I want to be brave
I want to be able to keep my head high
I want...I want and I want and i want
But wanting amounts to nothing when you realize
You are a coward
You are stubborn
You are strong willed yet so very weak
You are short
You are lost
You are, you are, you are
And then upon repeat mounts your flaws for the entire world to see
So now insignificantly significantly
You are made out of nothing
You live made out of nothing
I am nothing