It's Not You, It's Me Poem by Mark William Gilbert

I’m cutting you off
You want to know why
You thought I was different
That I wasn’t that guy
Well girl I’ve got issues
But you were too blind to see
You got mad when I said;
‘It’s not you, It’s me’

See meeting someone new to you
Sends tingles down your spine
Meeting someone new to me
Just makes me feel like dying
I can never share what’s on my mind
Or open up my heart
I’m miserable, you’re beautiful
We’re better off apart

In my youth I got wasted
Had no common sense
Those days sucked away
Every bit of my self confidence
And my great sense of humour
That you claim to adore
Is purely the result
Of all the vodka that I pour

You said you like to fly away
To places nice and hot
Well I won’t be flying with you
I just haven’t got a pot.
Won’t be driving either
Because I haven’t got a car.
To be fair I’ve never needed one
I don’t ever leave this bar

You rave about my baldness
But just check out my back
A million hairs are sprouting out
Right from my neck down to my crack
And if at first glance it seems
I appear to be slim
Believe me it takes it out of me
Forever breathing in

And as for the sex
Now that would be fun
You’d be half way to horny
I’d have jumped the gun
And if by some miracle
I did make you groan
You’d still have to leave
Once my mother got home

Now I’m not just trying
To lessen your pain
Or to let you down
In a gentle way
I’m just being honest
I hope that now you can see
It's really not you
It’s me