It’s Reality Poem by Anita Khelawan

I felt insecure and a bit unsure
Finally getting it, you and I is of no more
Why did I stayed here for so long
While everything indicated I should have been long gone
I believed you was my last
Silly girl I was fooled by a maharajah
What now?
I messed up and I have myself to blame
I can’t detach myself I like the burning of this flame
Why stay?
I trust you unfortunately you don’t feel the same way
You want to but you won’t
It’s understandable why you are so cold
You’ve given up on me yet I still keep faith
You say it ‘us’ won’t but still I wait and I wait
My mother laughs and makes jokes …
She said she should have beat me more when I was a child
Because it seems as if like to cry
You didn’t ask but I gave you the best of me
And through it all I lost my identity
One day all shall be redeem
But for now I have become the girl with low self-esteem
Sometimes I feel like causing self infliction
Sometimes I feel like dying
Hmmm I wind up doing nothing
Or have sleepless nights crying
I can’t come to closure…what I should do
I don’t hate you; I’m very much in love with you
You probably won’t see what’s coming
But if you do bet you still won’t do a thing
Of late I’m extremely emotional
Yea I’m tuff but I will always be a girl
You say I should get a life
Ok I’ll stop trying and accept your Good-Bye
Today for you
Tomorrow for me
I will be living out my dreams that have turned into a reality