Judge Poem by Dan Brown

Went out last Saturday.
With the lads.
Few drinks down the pub.
Watched the footy.
Only I stayed out later than I
was meant to.
And drank a bit more than I
was meant to, too.
Still had a good time though.
A guy pushed past me so I hit him.
I know I’m not what I used to be, but I
still look pretty hard. With my bald head and
snarl.
We had a fight in the street.
I was the
Loser.
I threw up over a policeman too. Well,
his shoes. I got a “stern ticking off”.
Then me and Stevo kicked a fence through.
Yeah, that lady wasn’t too
impressed when we kicked her gate THROUGH
her window.
On the way home, we sang “I Believe In
Miracles”. Really, really loudly.
And got yelled at.
Not my fault that old guy had
bad taste.
And when I got home, I kissed my
Kids
goodnight. Then went to bed to snuggle up to my
Wife.
I was ready for work the next day, as a

Judge.