Match.Nuthin Poem by Percy Dovetonsils

They're terrific.
They're out there
in great numbers
with their exercise
5 to 7 times a week,
their positive outlooks,
their empty nests,
their grown children
no longer living at home,
their beloved dogs
and iguanas,
their spirituality,
their divorces,
and separations,
the houses and settlements
they have
or have not
won,
their hopefulness
and historic, irreparable
grudges
against my gender,
their changes of life,
their high expectations
of travel
to Tuscany, Java, Alaska, and Aspen
at my expense,
their entrepreneurial careers,
their middlebrow reading,
which, if true,
is at least better than no reading at all.

And here I am
lurking in my bachelor pad
no longer
magnetized or anaesthesized
by unlimited sexual desire,
no longer willing
to jump through
hoops,
no longer entrancing
looking
or acting,
set in my ways,
and baffled why
I should reset
to theirs.