My Calling Poem by Joshua Hillard

Coming up and just staring at the time,
Wonder if this is my calling,
The calling of a crime,

Suicide maniac on the low, about to scream,
At the laughing of the devil,
As he starts to gleam,

Feeling all the stress and the pain at my heart,
So lost in this world,
I don’t know where to start,
Seems as if my world is coming apart,
It’s like shopping; I’m pushed with the cart,

Pushed around in life,
Slowly picking things up,
Weight getting so heavy, it’s starting to get tough,

But I get used to it,
It’s something I must have,
But than it is put back,
Bringing me to my path,

Which is the path that I’m going to take?
It splits left and right; soon to break,
I know one path with show my fate,
But the other will show me hate, hate, hate,

I know one path can show me fate,
But what are the risks,
That my life is willing to take,

Breathing is getting hard,
Death is getting close,
I don’t know what to do,
This is the path that I chose,

Feeling anxiety and agony everywhere,
Knowing that I should live,
But I just don’t care,

All the pain growing up but letting it ease past,
Than it turned around,
And it happened so fast,

It’s like a lightning bolt,
Gaining strength with each charge,
Pain is its current,
Ready to strike when it’s large,

Waiting for clouds on a dark day to cover you,
When you are lost in the paths,
You’ll sit there and wonder too,

Which is the path that I’m going to take?
It splits left and right; soon to break,
I know one path with show my fate,
But the other will show me hate, hate, hate,