Obese Birds Poem by Paul Holmes

Can you ever imagine
How life would really be
If most birds were obese
And fell from their tree?
Sparrows staggering somehow
Around with bent beaks
Upturned to the sky
Awaiting helpful tweaks!
Alas, when the rain showers
Fall like you wouldn’t believe
You’d see Sparrows wearing snorkels
To help them better breathe!
And then an Albatross
Won’t be able to leave the ground
Due to overeating fish
And turning overly round.
Ducks, when thrown some bread
By children in the park
Would slowly, steadily sink
As surely as a dog does bark!
Swallows they would swallow
Many, too many flies
And end up heavily crashing
From our summer skies.
Then, all the newspapers
On the front page would read:
“We’re Fed up with Obese Birds
Please, Do NOT feed! ”