Oxytocin - Poem by Salma Ahmed
Do you know that when you look,
And when your smile my soul invades,
The whole universe around me, it shook,
Do you know the sweetness of your blade?
Have you seen the involuntary glistening
Of my eyes at the sight of you?
To the words beyond the words have you been listening?
Do you hear that, love? It is for you.
It's all about you, from the time I wake,
Till the time I bleed myself hollow,
Till my heart cracks and I slowly break,
At the feet of your love's leaching sorrow.
And I still follow, because they made me believe,
That love is god's heaven on earth,
Yet I cross the moorlands on horses of grieve,
They gallop freely, run home, there's no girth.
Take me from him, take me to him,
He's the start, he's where all life ends,
Take me to him, horses, grey and grim,
Maybe when he sees you, his heart bends.
Or maybe when I reach his gardens,
I will find them blooming for another,
My feet grow weaker, his ice hardens,
And it burns me, and I burn the heather.
To spicks and twigs and yellowish wreckage,
That engulfs all what there is, the universe
Broken to pits of stars and black holes in a cage,
Condemned to be resolved by my flying verse.
Like a curse never meant to be cast,
One that was born of rusty crowns and thrones,
Once, my love, I told you that nothing lasts,
And that's why the fire slept in my bones.
Then the fire burned them frail and thin,
Then you made them strong and yours,
For whoever gives meaning to the soul and skin
And makes them one creature, shall cure-
The unforgivable curse, memories dying untold,
Sometimes never born, and quietly buried
In the dreams of now, in your heart of gold,
In my breath and out, to their doom they hurried.
But memories are no timid creatures to die,
Their corpses make you cry when you want to smile,
Their essence make you smile when you want to cry,
Memories don't die, my love, they just sleep for a while.
Then they grow old and themselves with poetry they fill,
And they enslave the horses grieve, make them wild,
Ride on; fear not, their fall will surely kill
You, if you're lucky, your soul sleeps timid and mild.
And at its wake the faith shines strong,
Even though, love, you always come back only for doubt,
And for fears, for tears and obsessions, and all what's wrong,
To nourish your throat at the time of drought.
But I apologize, for my faith in you
Can not be with doubt replaced,
Even though obsessions and tears are true,
Everything to faith can always be traced.
It is where my heart is entombed
It is the root of love, the core of dreams,
And it is the first sign of my surrender, the doomed
Path where silence is enchained in screams.
Obey, for your soul doesn't belong to you,
Obey, the devil's rhyme, your master's perturbations,
Dance, on the graves of faith, love and the moor's woe,
Close your eyes, spin and ask not for explanations.
Sin, to feel the dust that your faith envelops,
Maybe then you'll remember you still have some,
Behold the mutations that in your soul develop,
As they bring you to your knees till your times comes.
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