Pea Shooters Bore Me To Death Poem by Syed Ahmed Shah

Hiding in the shadow of my unconditional love
You spew venom like a toothless cobra
(Come out in the open with all guns blazing…
Make me proud of your hostility)

While you count brownie points
Watching TV in your drawing room
I am in your kitchen
Sipping tea and gossiping with your adorable wife
She wants me to do some errands for her
I will...
I will fix the leaking pipe
The bulb in the corridor blinks a lot; have to check the fuse.
I will find her a new maid, ASAP (The old one eloped with the neighbors driver)
Do I know a good mathematics tutor for the kids?

Your kids…
What lovely kids you have
We play games
Share jokes
Talk sports
The elder one shows me his school trophies
The younger, his new stamp collection
I try their new guitar and make a fool of myself
While they roll out laughing…

And your aged parents…
I soil their feet with my unclean hands
And they shower their love on me
As if I am their blood
('Don't I have a decent shirt. Get rid of that shocking yellow')

And you…
My pseudo rabid friend
You are not even sure of your poison
Look at your face
What a silly clown you are turning out to be…