Perfectionist Poem by MKM MKM

I didn't think I was fat but I knew I was numb
Nobody is listening but I know I'm not dumb
Or crazy.
Perhaps I'm just lazy.

No longer can I
hide behind my make up.
No longer can I
Restrain myself with bobby pins and cardigans.
No longer can I
Burn my hair and blister my feet
When I am hungry I will eat.
And purge.

Mom, I'm sick

Honey, you're fine
No daughter of mine
Can be... unstable
Now, dinner is ready set the table.


So I learnt how to cope
And I crammed that toothbrush straight down my throat
Puking the very self respect that I'm trying to gain
Control of my stomach seems to kill the pain

No one can know I'm messed up.
Because I have no right to be
I'm from a stable home and I have a nice family
Nobody wants to see this blue-eyed blonde
and know something horrible is going on.