Retirement Poem by Doug Lane

I don't think
anyone
except Daniel Day-Lewis
wants Daniel Day-Lewis
to retire,
though I'm not
entirely at ease
with the way
all the women
I know
ooh and aah
over him
just as they did
25 years ago
in The Last of the Mohicans
and My Left Foot.

I read
he spent a year
and some months
training as a seamstress
or seamstor
or whatever
a male sew-er (not a sewer)
is called,
and that seems (seams)
downright crazy
to me,
but it works
for the movie
and anyway
what else
was he going to do
with that time?

Drive his sports car
wildly
round the narrow
country roads
of Italy (Anthony Quinn)
or Ireland (Matthew Broderick)
until he
ran over some peasant?

I'm just thinking,
Daniel,
that in a few years
you'll get bored
with fox hunting
or potting,
or meditation,
or whatever
you're up to,
and when you do,
don't be embarrassed
that you said
you were retiring
forever.

Just jump
right back in the saddle
as if you
never left
the set.
Women and
jealous boyfriends alike,
we'll only be glad
you did.