So Wrong! By Gio Masserati Poem by Gio Masserati

So Wrong!

i give i give i give
he takes
absorbing me by his charms
charfacter default
deceiving charisma
not straightforward
uses my good graces
to his advantage
stick that dagger in
is it not deep enough?
to satisfy your insatiable ego
lust?
twisting it so coy
as if you're unaware
yes
stab me repeatedly
the hurt will never end
it seems
and you smile
my heart melts
wishing I never met you
ever
i shatter
broken vessel
how could I be so sure of being led
and then it's a lie

You say you can heal me
how?

only on here
in poem land
do I share my brokenness
if not
did it never happen?
or did there just not exist
the writing on the wall
the evidence on paper?

all for nothing

my pain is real
only you readers
lovers of the arts
expressionists
will share in my pain
hear my cries of despair
where is reality?

words
words
words

if not here in this moment
my heart would die silently
with no witness
to the testiment
i lay before you
you are the only reality
i live with
but why the heck
do you feel so far out there?
why do you seem unreal?

I feel alone
too artsy
too spiritual
for this realm
to love me
love my passion
love my grace
who would be the kind man?
the one good man
I don't want
need
a bunch hanging around
just want one good man after God's heart
Is this too much to ask?

until then
this shell shock
of unrequited love
shall surely pass me
not over me
unfortunate as may be
this must suck the life out of me
in and through
the hard way
i am enduring it in this second
every second will be one closer
to the end of suffering
then
breathe in me new life
into me
Jesus?
please