Stuck Poem by Khumo Mhlanga

My mind
A puppy trying to catch its tail...
Circles of confusion & indecision
A second try
I'm lost to why
I said yes

I know my heart
Lived through the aftermath -
The shattered mirror of your words
Emotions forbidding normal function -
No food to mouth or rest to body.
The embodiment of what lay in places unseen.
Yearning for tomorrow
When hearing your name and seeing your face won't be salt to my wound
But how do I live through this hour?

A young amusement -
Passing conquest...imploding universe

In that sacred moment when souls whispered yes,
I was hurting you -
At least I wanted to be
Can you hurt a ghost?
Punching water.
I robbed him -
Focused on bringing you pain.

If I'm so scared of this repeat offender,
Why the euphoric submission to your shackles?
Mind begging heart
Pleas for disconnection
I shouldn't have you...

But I love you.