julio anzueto

Sweet Pain Of Mine

Everyday people rise up and go about their business, nothing seems to bother them, or haunt them. Others wake up with the expression in their face that yells out a cry that comes from deep within their selves, broken hearten, and depressed, they seem to only have one way out of it, though there are many other ways to recover from their heart ache. Many like me look for an easy way to calm the pain and forget about that ache; I chose alcohol as a way to hide, and drown my pain deep within my soul. This was the path I decided to take, glasses of vodka to cure that sweet pain of mine. I call it sweet for all the memories it brings to me, I call it pain for what it makes me feel after realizing my love, my soul, my happiness, Guzzy is not next to me anymore, and when that happens… the first glass of vodka is beginning to kiss my lips, slowly taking that sweet pain of mine away from my heart.
Resulting from the vodka spell that I fall into every night, I begin to relive that summer of 2008, which was perfect for while it lasted, fun times, great memories, as I spent most of those days next to Guzzy the one I call my love. During those days I never thought of drinking, not even a single shot of liquor, not one. I was happy, I had the person I loved next to me; I held her hand every day, kissed her as hard as I could. Hugged her every time I had the chance, said to her I love you every day, hour, minute, and second I reminded her how much I loved her. We had planned to spend our summer together one year before but due to life situations we were forced to be apart, but this summer we had the chance to live, smile, walk, cry, run, talk, swim, eat, love, all while we spent the summer together, we did everything together. Like any other sweet story, there was pain soon to come, August was soon to be over and so was our summer life. All I knew was that I and Guzzy were soon going to be apart once more. The day of her departure arrived I felt lost, with no energy, without any inspiration within my soul, I needed a friend, someone to talk to, I needed someone to listen to what I had to said, I looked every where and I found that friend, in a bottle of vodka.
Every morning was the same routine; I woke up to the bottle of liquor next to my bed, top off and almost as dry as a dessert, my friend had gone away during the night, and I once again felt the need to look for a her. I liked my new friend, she reminded me of my girl, brought back to me the good times I spent next to my love, but as I began to feel, realize, and see that I was alone, and that my love was not home my bottled friend began to fall, filling up my glass. After every shot my sorrow decreased, but still I screamed, yelled, shouted, and cried why did I not hold her hand longer, kiss her harder, hugged her every chance I had? And like every night the last shot came with the cry “why did I not let her know how much I really love her.” After that last shot, my pain was once again covered by my friend’s magic cloth that seemed to make my pain disappear, made that sweet pain of mine rest in peace deep within my heart.

Poem Submitted: Thursday, September 25, 2008

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Comments about Sweet Pain Of Mine by julio anzueto

  • Sulaiman Mohd YusofSulaiman Mohd Yusof (9/27/2008 7:37:00 PM)

    Sweet pain could be your bitter happiness and that happiness is as sweet as your pain.Nice thought Julio!

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