The Cosmic Cur Poem by Jonathan Andrews

Something dark and sinister
Lurked on the Cosmic Cur--
The pirate ship, adrift in space,
Was bearer of an evil race;
The race was dark and full of fur.

When the Cosmic Cur was found,
No one heard a single sound.
Then the ball of fur attacked--
Leader-man, he sure got sacked!
The little critter weighed ten pound.

An awful battle then ensued;
The little things were right near rude!
They knocked down each single man,
Who could not then get up again;
I guess they then got used for food.

We couldn't beat back those vile things--
They flew at us, like they had wings--
I tried my best not to get hit,
But that's when they all had a fit;
They howled, as any vile one sings.

That, right there, was what scared me;
I wouldn't stay for China's tea.
I ran away, as did my friends:
We knew that we had met our ends.
Then I got hit, down to one knee!

As I fell, I wheeled about.
All I saw was one huge snout!
Then it made an awful scream;
In its eye there was a gleam,
So I yelled a helpless shout.

Dead I knew I was for sure,
The torture I could not endure.
I waited for the end to come;
Sat there, seeing nothing, numb,
As ended it its overture.

On and on, right there I sat,
Feeling lowly as a gnat;
Suddenly I felt a lick
Looked did I, though I felt sick--
The hairy monster was a cat!

The Cosmic Cur, the voided wreck;
We looked o'er, and hold did check.
Although we looked, we naught did fin'--
Besides the group of cute felines--
We took her home, from her own deck.

Now sits the Cosmic Cur in space,
No longer holding that foul race.
So it sits, and stays, and waits,
Tempting neither men nor fates,
Keeping up its sleepy pace.

Unless there comes another race,
To threaten man, and show its face...