The Earthquake Poem by Sheena Blackhall

A yowe in Ardnamurchan
Lost two teeth and a fleeceful of fleas
When the earthquake struck

On Ben Ledi two tourists
Feeling the earth move beneath them
Thought that the Highland air
Had boosted their libido

A scone on a plate in Kilmahog
Slid two centimeters to the right
Into a blob of raspberry jam
(A jar from a batch that hardly set at all)

Ochone said the old woman
Gardening in Moidart
The curse of the wind farms
Has surely come upon us

A mole in velvet livery
Had his ceiling crumble like curdled cheese
Around his dainty ears
Indicating the end of the world

When nobody was killed, mislaid, or injured
Although the signs and portents weren't good