The Mayor Of Toronto Poem by Kevin Patrick

The mayor of Toronto has cutback public service
Deciding that people are an affront to his office
How dare they want things deserved from their leaders
Shouldn't they be happy for paying their taxes?
So goodbye Libraries, hospitals and public transport
You're gone to pay for jails and the policemen's donuts
The only sanitation is another cup from timmies
Were regulars converge to scorn the Maple Leafs


There was an old lady who thought for her meals
She went to city council and complained about abuse
But the mayor sat in his chair looking slightly obtuse
Wondering if she dropped would she taste like veal?
Then Marge paid a visit in her Viking regalia
Prompting the mayor to run in hysteria
He called the police with the fury of curses
Peering through the window to spot hot nurses

He doesn't like drugs but he does endorse snow
Especially the specials that fall in his nose
He's not big for Gay, though he is Gay for Bigots
For him men are Bears taking care of their Cubs
Education to him is corrupted with liberalism
Polluted with thoughts that corrupt family values



He's right in the sense that educations solves problems
Like learning to pick mayors who don't cause these troubles