The Stud (Bull) Poem by Nicola McCleary

When you're a bull and top notch stud
You don't sit around chewing the cud
A career as a stud is like ‘The Sun', Page 3
Paraded and used for all you can be.
There is a criteria in which one must fit
Analysed thoroughly to the last bit
It's a lot like a catwalk in which one must strut
Head held high and nice tight butt
Of course there's your assets - the job must be done
Put in a field for a whole day of fun

When you're a stud with a field full of cow
You can't just perform, ‘Do it right now! '
Takes time and control to woe her affection
Take her to water to see her reflection
Make her feel good, flatter her shape
After all this mustn't be rape
Within a few hours she'll come to see sense
Relaxing and seeing she's no longer tense
Gently the stud will mount from behind
There's no use for words or trying to be kind

When you've performed, your audience roars
And inside you feel like your whole heart soars
Drinks all round and a pat on the rump
All of this praise just for a pump
Testosterone flows as the stud moves on
Fully engrossed in the heightening throng
Cow by cow he satisfies the need
Gets on with the show and completes the deed
Usually a field numbers twenty or so
You work your way through, just go with the flow

As the sun starts to set, the girls are all beat
Any ones left just admit to defeat
Tired as you are, there's a night to go through
All you can hear is the sound of their ‘moo'
By morning, you're up and back on the prowl
You open your jaws and let out a howl
Just letting the girls know, all will be had
As a prised bull you will never be bad
Led back to the pen where fresh hay awaits
Then tomorrow will bring a new field of dates