The Waiting List Poem by Joe Hughes

I need false teeth, yes glasses,
I could do with a facial tuck.
Now both my hips should be replaced -
I'm running out of luck!

My knees are so arthritic,
Two bunions give me gip.
I've got verruca on both feet -
I've a cancer ridden lip!

I've got asthma, some bronchitis,
My chest is full of muck.
I'm overweight, yes breathless,
In doorways I get stuck!

My prostate is enlarged,
My poor liver's getting bigger.
My eyes are growing dim -
I can hardly see my dinner!

I saw my doctor yesterday,
I do need hospital care,
So now I'm on each waiting list
From here to County Clare.
But now I sit at home alone,
I can't eat or drink or wee
But I know I'll get my treatment by
The time I'm ninety three!