Thursday, October 29, 2009

The Wish Granter

Rating: 5.0
a foreign man comes weak and empty form his home, scared and exhausted, he collapse's in what appears to be an oasis to him, he awakes within a mansion with a strange plump old man.
'are you okay young man'
' i feel.... better'
the old man laughs
' of course you do, you; re in the presence of the 'wish granter'
' wish granter? '
'yes i will grant your wishes but in turn you must do something for me, what is it you desire dear boy? '
'i need a home'
the old man chuckles
'this will be your home, boy, however if you wish to stay you must be my slave'
'what would you have me do'
'work day in and day out'
the man looks stunned and disappointed
' oh don't worry you'll have your own personal time, whilst your here you shall never age'
the man laughs in his head seeing that the old man has clearly aged
' okay I'll work for you'
' if you have any other desires please tell me my boy and i shall fulfill them'
the man worked vigorously for what felt years, then one day the man had another desire and approached the wish granter
' you have done splendid work her my boy'
' yes i am aware, i have another desire sir'
'and what might that be my boy'
'i want a companion, a friend in which i could converse with'
' oh do i not fit such description'
'oh you do sir, but it feels so empty here'
' very well boy, i shall build you a town in which many people will live and respect you'
'thank you sir'
the town appeared out of thin air next to the great oasis in which the man lived, it appeared to be a small desert town where technology seemed very low and the towns buildings appeared to be made of wood like an old western outpost, and within the town were people who respected the man like a good the conversed with him and even accompanied him with his work, until the day came when the man had another desire,
'welcome back my boy, you have another desire do you not.'
'yes sir, i desire a wife'
'but there are many women in your city do none of them have what you seek'
' no sir...not a one the people of the town are always a delight to talk too but i wish to have someone who i can do more than talk to someone who knows and understands me'
'ohhoohoo that is quite a desire my boy you'll have to give me something great for that'
'anything sir'
'your soul'
the man is astounded by the old mans charge but he accepts
then a small girl appears behind the old mans chair
'she will grow to become your wife, in 21 years she will be yours'
the man continued his work but over the years the town was falling apart and the men began to hate him but even still all he thought about was his wife, and no man dared to touch her,
then after 21 years he went to the wish granter for one last time
'it has been 21 years sir'
'that it has my boy, and i shall uphold my bargain'
the old man whistled and the girl came into the room.
the man was mesmerized.
' my precious girl this man has worked 21 years'
' yes i have noticed father'
' he has worked for you... he desires you to be his wife'
the girl is astounded
'father....i don't know this man i cannot be his wife'
the man looks disappointed
'you must my child it is the reason you were made'
the girl begins crying
'and if you dont appease this man i will reap your soul'
later on the man returns to his house and finds his wife
'you are very beautiful my love'
the girl begins to cry.
'why do you cry, are you not happy'
'no....i don't belong to you i don't belong to anyone'
the man is outraged and backhands his wife and attempts to force himself on his wife
'you are mine! ! ! , i have spent 21 years working hard just for you! ! ! ! '
the girl find a candle stand and screams'
'i am not yours'
and then she hits the man on the heads collapsing his skull
then the town begins to wither away and the people die whilst the ground shakes
the girl runs to the wish granter
' my husband is dead'
'i am aware my child it was your destiny to kill him'
the girl is frightened by the old mans words
' this was not his haven but is hell i have his soul just like all the others'
'the others? '
'yes my dear, i am no wish granter i am but a con man i give you what you want but in the end i get what i want and souls is what i need for i am a soul reaper i gather the 'pure souls' once they've committed a cardinal sin or once they've given it freely to me and i get paid in hell, you see i am the top employee i succumb man into his greed and steal their souls'
the girl is immobilized by fear when a light shines through this dream world and reflects what the old man truly is, , , , a demon with horns wrapped within an abyss inserting him from his world to hell, ' damn not the divine light not at a time like this, i will have to finish you quickly my child cause once i have your soul i will be reborn! ! ! '
the beast leaps forward and a blade appears from thin air across the room she dashes from the beasts grasp to the blade, which is golden and shining in the light, the beast blinded by his greed lunges towards the girl as she raises the blade and sweeps through the beast sparking a blinding light disintegrating the beast and destroying the world.
the girl awakes on a cloud
'where am i'
and a huge booming voice says
'you are home, this is where you will rest for you are pure of heart, this is your haven'
jaques leblanc
Jazz Annis 03 November 2009
i can't believe u! ! i knew u were a great writer but man! ! i can't believe what u wrote! ! it's amazin it's like one of the best (in my opinion) becuz it's the only thing that i really read that u wrote! ! that was a really good story and it kept me reading...i loved it! ! i do not wish to write like u but to improve my writings to a degree where ppl will think just as much of my writings as they think of yours...'amazing...' ur truly one of a kind...
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Carol Gall 29 October 2009
agreat story kept me reading 10
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Ying Escalona 29 October 2009
nice story Jaq.....i am so thrilled...
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