Too Fast Poem by JAMES T. ADAIR

My little girl is 27 today
my oh my
sad how quickly time passes away
it all seems like just yesterday
Her newborn blue eyes looking my way
and catching me crying in their glance
thinking about fate and happenstance
and how she came by surprise
an innocent victim of romance
that didn't give love much of a chance
but I loved her before she came
loved her just the same
picked out her name: Stephanie
after a princess I read about in a magazine
before life lost it's sheen
I remember being so afraid
feeling the weight of mistakes I'd made
and wondering how we'd survive
but I vowed to love her and to help her thrive
back when I was so scared and unsure
but my hopes and intentions, so pure
and here she is all grown up and 27
as if not a day of life has passed
but most of life has gone away
and I lost in it some way
trying to hold onto things that come and go
and no matter how hard you wish
none of it does stay
and now I'm the one who needs care
and none of it feels fair
in the empty room tonight
I stare
my eyes feeling the irritation of the air
and an emptiness is everywhere
as I think about the texture of her hair
in the newborn baby ward
as I held and fed her there
remembering the smell of baby oil
and little fingers and her stare
and on the phone tonight there was a hesitation
as neither she or I could say 'I love you'
I felt the strain of our wounded relation
because of all the hurt that is so slow to heal
and I'm trying to let myself feel
but the words just don't come out
though I wish I could shout
and when I hung up the phone
I still felt alone
so much has past
and all of it went by too fast