Trump's Block The Vote Poem by Percy Dovetonsils

He's willing to openly sabotage the USPS
to block mail in ballots,
so why not go all the way?
Post those anonymous
Homeland Security thugz,
who have been arresting
Portland protesters in the night
without charging them,
at the polls.

They can make educated guesses
about which ones....the nonwhite, the young,
those speaking with accents, uppity looking women,
the ones not carrying assault rifles
and flak jackets and MAGA hats....
are Democrats
and spirit them away
never to be seen or heard from again,
or just blow them away
on the spot.

Less bloody but just as effective
is identifying the Democratic ballots
and tossing them in a bonfire....
along with the bodies
of liquidated Democratic voters.

Figure out which polling stations
are likely to have more Democratic voters
and order the Air Force to smart missile
them to ashes.
Those Air Force generals will roll over
and obey, right?
It's their duty.
Don's the Commander in Chief.
If some neighboring buildings
are also demolished,
well, that's the cost of doing business
in politics.

Check the voter rolls
for names that sound "black"
and erase all the Jeffersons and Washingtons.
And the Muslim names and Spanish names,
too.
Oh wait, the GOP is already doing that.
And has been doing that for decades.
Remember Florida in 2000?

Make black voters
guess how many jelly beans
are in the jar.
If they guess wrong,
they don't get to vote.
And don't use transparent jars.
That gives the blacks
too much of a guessing chance.
Oh wait, that's a voter suppression tactic
from the Jim Crow South.
But Trump is turning back the clock,
Making America Great Again.
If it worked back in the good ol' days,
why not try it again?

And let Russians hackers
spread outrageous smears
on social networks and
break into the computerized voter system
and switch all the Democratic votes
to Republican votes.
It worked in 2016.
So do it again.
And they are, baby, they are.

Or save yourself a headache
and just cancel the elections outright.
Donald can name himself President for Life.
Who's going to tell him he can't?
All his favorite role models do it.
The military and the paramilitary cops
will back him up, right?
And the Congressional elections
can be cancelled as well.
Declare all opposition parties
ineligible to hold office.
If anybody protests,
round them up in paddy wagons
and truck them to local sports stadiums.
Nobody's using the stadiums anyway
during the pandemic.
Just stand 'em up
against the cheap seats
andexecute them
and bury them in mass graves,
with bulldozers,
under the gridirons.
They can always be
resodded.
No muss, no fuss.

Or to hell with President for Life.
Crown Trump Emperor
by divine right.
Elections? Shmellections.
This simplies everything.
If Emperor Trump doesn't live forever,
if he somehow dies of old age,
Donald Trump, Jr, becomes the new emperor.
A Trump dynasty
will last one thousand years.

At last we can stop pretending
we're a democracy
with a Constitution.
What a relief
that will be!
This is a nation
of the Donald, by the Donald, for the Donald.
Why pretend otherwise?