Trumping Heaven Poem by George BernardBloodyShaw

You see,
this efylump
had to go to heaven
but good heavens
p'raps was not to be.
He was told
by St Peter so bold
'You get in
the bloody queue,
behind them cabbage
and ants.'
No doubt efylump
thought
'Oh, pants.'
Then St Peter went
heaven sent
on his tea break!
Efylump thought
'To my advantage
this I'll make
this weight
of waiting
is annoying me
so 'ave your tea.
I'll just be me,
eat the cabbage
tho' I'm not a savage
then squash the ants
with their silly rants
afore they invade
my efylump underpants.
Oh! 'Ello Pete
again we meet,
tea break good?
And so it should.
As you see
I'm now first to be
either heaven sent
or wot?
It's for you
to do
what you will
within that will of your god.
By God.'