Tryst Between Unwillingness And Conscience 6.3.2008 Poem by Margaret Alice

I don’t want to be here now, again
painted my lighthouse mermaid with
glitter in silver and gold, played with
the picture you sent me, changed
her lips and eyebrows

Donned my black suit, changed the
world’s fate in an imaginary political
coup, hoping that thinking the right
thought would take me to where I
should be

Which is, unfortunately, NOT where
my heart wants to be at all, how do
I submit with grace to my fate? My
fate, apparently, is to be bored with
my state of consciousness

Trying to change my thoughts is failing
completely, organising a tryst between
the unwillingness living within me and
my conscience, is proving to be a total
disaster…