Tuesday 3am Poem by Bri Marie Ormsbee

Tuesday,3am
Once again I'm wide awake.
Waiting for this time to mend this heart of mine,
That keeps on breaking.
Newspapers I throw away
Try to busy myself, wash the dishes in the sink.
I avoid the mirrors can't bring myself to see how I look without you by my side.
3am, on a Tuesday, can't seem to quite to fall asleep
I have to much time to think.

I could call out to heaven, I could crawl down through hell
Nothing will change the way we were, and nothing ever will

And I know you can't hear me cry
And it seems no matter hard I try your presence it haunts my mind.
And I pretend that I don't dwell about the 3am's I spend wrestling with your ghost.

Do you hear when I call out to heaven, Do you laugh as I crawl down through hell.
I can't get over you
Somewhere deep down I know I never will.

Nothing I can say can bring you back
I've got nothing to show
But a broken heart shaped watch and memories
For that kiss, a secret, no one will ever know.

I could call out to heaven, I could crawl down through hell
Nothing will change the way we were, and nothing ever will

Do you hear when I call out to heaven, do you laugh as I crawl down through hell
I can't get over you
Somewhere deep down I know I never will

And I don't know how much more of this I can take
The storm of thoughts of you in my head
My, world, my life it's become so fake
All the notes you wrote for me they don't serve as a proper memory
They lay scattered upon my bed
As I lie awake another night...
Trying to figure out just who I am, another Tuesday at 3am

Do you hear when I call out to heaven, Do you laugh as I crawl down through hell
It seems I'm not finding you.
Somewhere deep down, I won't admit it but I know I never will

And I'll be left here still alone, thinking of the 'I love you's' you once told
Surrounding me, the words now dead and cold, it seems I have nowhere else to go

So I'll wait for the day you can hear me call out to heaven, when you can no longer bare laughing at me falling farther and farther into the black and you will reach your hand out and help me crawl out from hell.

Until then I'll be here wide awake the same time, Tuesday at 3am.