Not so very long ago, my brother left me all alone.
Over many quarrels and adventurous afternoons forgotten,
His drinking, his music, he got caught up in.
While I made vows, so in love, he was rotting his irreplaceable self.
All because of consecutive binging, all because of no self control.
It’s not a problem, I would deny to myself, he’s not in trouble, he just needs a little help.
If only I could change it now.
Ah, I remember in that cold January,
And the empty bottles began making his destiny for him.
Desperately I wish to help; - conceited, I believed he could help himself.
I was wrong, oh so sorrowfully wrong- sorrow for Larry-
The musical, talented, troubled of whom my angel mother named, Larry-
Now carved in stone.
And soon the quiet words of my daughters,
Wanting to know why they don’t have an uncle,
Thrilled me- filled me with answers
I wasn’t willing to share- questions that scared me.
So that now-my answer was merely
An excuse-my brother is dead-nothing more.
Now, their understanding is better,
I can’t keep it from them any longer.
The fact is, I was hiding- now I’m stronger.
Now my daughters have no interest, in the details in his departure,
But this time I wish you’d hear me, when I say he didn’t know.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.