Understanding Myself Poem by RIC BASTASA

To be tough on myself and always go
For perfection
And be strict and rigid and self- righteous
There is so much sadness in here
Unnecessary pain

There is always a time to pamper myself
With my own foolishness
To laugh at myself and humiliate it
Before my eyes
To see how it can be humble and be
Simply itself
In its own smallness and madness

Behind this faith I must have doubts
As a way of self-measure
Behind this morality I must have my own
Taste of private sins
As a matter of discovering what lies
Behind me inside me outside me
This personal humanity

When you see me again I shall wear this smile
This understanding
Of what I am and what are we really
Double-faced and double-natured
Body and soul, spirit and flesh
Feel me as I feel myself
Touch me as I too touch myself
I dive to earth as body and flesh
Then I soar to the skies
As soul as spirit as finally limitless and forever free