Untold Chapters Failed By Masquerade Poem by Koketso Patience Banda

Constant battles brewing within
It's getting hard to keep up the facade
Once the mask is off and reality dawns on me
I fall apart
Shattered into a million pieces
Somehow holding on by a very thin strand
Not knowing where it's from
I have become very good at faking happiness
Depressed and broken on the inside
I am basically a fire ball of emotions
Just waiting for an opportunity to explode.

A piece of myself is lost with every passing moment
With every breath I take
I am screaming out for help
But it seems I am inaudible
And my cries do not reach a soul
The anxiety creeps in making room for the depression
Uninvited and unwanted guests.

A stream of tears flooded my pillow as I fell apart behind closed doors
I slowly slipped into the dark abyss that I tried so hard not to fall back into
I lost myself among the gentle breeze
You'd think it would calm me down but it just does the opposite.

My heart is withered like grass
I groan in distress
Laying awake in my own little world
Feeling like a bird alone on the roof
In a shell I do not even want to be in
Trapped in myself with no exit
My strength has been broken
Gone is the hope of ever seeing the light
I am feeling worn out like an old garment
Like a piece of clothing soon to be thrown out.