Utterance Poem by Austen Reese

I don't know if you'll be surprised by this,
I haven't been that good of an actress.

Feelings like these are difficult to extinguish,
the wick won't drown, and it won't burn out.

The light in your eyes sustains the flame,
the fire in your soul illuminates the darkest parts of me.

I often feel myself swimming in your clear lake eyes,
as I succumb to your siren song drawing me in.

You see me in a way that no one ever has,
in a way in which nobody has ever tried.

Your essence of fire and earth, so passionate yet grounded,
balances my water and air, deep but flighty.

Sometimes, you let me see you, too,
You open the door to your mind palace just enough for me glimpse inside.

You live life out loud, unapologetically,
but I see that you need someone to help grip the weight you carry.

I've imagined holding your hand in mine, hugging you from behind in the kitchen,
and laying my head on your shoulder while we listen to music.

But I haven't told you any of this until now.
I still don't think I should say the words out loud.

Because I decided, a long time ago,
I'd rather have not enough of you than have none.

What if these words mean that you stop seeing me?
What if this means that you choose to walk away?

Because, my love, I know that I'm not what you imagined.
I am not with whom you see yourself growing old.

Mine aren't the eyes you want to swim in,
mine aren't the hands you long to hold.

I don't have a fire or song to draw you in,
and I'm afraid that your light in the depths of my soul is far too frightening.

But what if, for a second we pretend?
We temporarily believe that you'd love the feel of my skin on your skin.

What if my soul lit yours on fire?
What if my song called you in?

Do you think this is a world you could live in?
That it could ever really be true?

I promise I'll love you more than you've ever been loved,
I'll hold on and never let go.

Do you think you can love me the way I love you?

Please say something.