Visual Lies Poem by Eman Awad

I know it's not a dream when i wake,
to find the scars all over my body bleeding still.
I just know it, when my heart break,
and i just can't get my self out of that hell.
I see me standing with my back to a closed door,
i don't look back and i walk ahead bare at my feet.
I don't know if i left where i've been before,
but i walk on by in the coldness and in severe heat.
I face all those people that i once knew,
cold faces, and even colder than they were.
I see the road ahead that i walk through,
wishing to wake up and never find me there.
I can't tell if it's dark, some times i see,
i can't tell if it's cold, some times i breathe.
No need for reminding, those faces left me,
those faces, left such emptyness underneath.
And through it all i may see a helping hand,
but whom would i trust in such a distant place.
I won't do it, though i don't understand,
how to take the hand, which for has no face?
Every time i dream this, i do the same,
the same painful story goes on every night.
Like i'm living an ended life all over again,
maybe that's what i'll do, till hope's in sight.
While the world is sleeping, they think i am,
but i'm wide awake, just closing my weary eyes.
No one wakes for me, they don't give a damn,
and i'll never be saved from all those visual lies.
I reach out for a blooming flora but i bleed,
i bleed my heart out from its' thorns cutting me.
I know i wouldn't if i ever saw its' seed,
if i ever looked around but i never do eventually.
The faces of who i know of their love,
are chained like i am, walking towards the end.
Then meteors fall like rain from above,
i run, i fall, i cry and while i'm running i bend.
Just to drown in a sea of what i think is tears,
and while i'm struggling for my life i see memories.
All the memories of goodbyes and wounds and fears,
and just when i think i'm dying i feel them like reveries.
Then i reach out to the handle of the door,
but the key is hidden some where with some one.
Coming towards me and suddenly he's no more,
but i open the door and step out,
and while the door is closing,
i look back just to find him gone...