Pandora's Box

Vocation - Poem by Pandora's Box

Death of my own self.
Loss of my own wants, needs.
What do I like anymore?
I become lost in them.

Was I made to be a mother?
I did choose this vocation,
this life.
I did choose
to have babies,
to stay home with them,
nurture them,
teach them,
love them.

And love them I do.
Would I die for them?
In a heartbeat.

But isn't a mother supposed to love…BEING a mother?
How can I be so bad at it?
Wrong so many times?
Behind and late on so many things?
Angry so often?
Wanting to run?
Why does my love for them
not give me

I feel I fail them at every turn.
I know I am not alone.
I know mothers have felt this way
since the dawn of time.
But as much as I know this,
for whatever reason,
it offers little comfort.

Fa iling
Striving to do better
Losing myself
Fearing I will never again be found

And finding myself…lost in them.

Poet's Notes about The Poem

I think all mothers have times like this....we just don't like to say it out loud.....

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Poem Submitted: Sunday, May 13, 2012

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