Why - Poem by sticker mykes

as long as i have this last piece of paper you still exist, if i throw u away you will only be a harsh memory and that i dont want, i dont want memories, so many of them, each memory is bitter then the other, painful then the last one when will this end. i already cleaned everything, i thought my heart and mind were rid of you but why again, why again..... i am getting sick now, icant get my soul molested by your thoughts, my heart polluted by your false promises, i dont want to look back in the rear view im sick of it, i cant stand in the window waiting for you, looking outside thinking that there is something better....what did i deserve to get this? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? how did i end this way? ? ? ? i knew it was all botteled up but why did it to had come out this way.its a crime to jot down these memories, why am i trembling what is this sobbing noise i hear why does it feel like betrayal.....................................why. i didnt betray, i was stranded left to face on my own. im still stranded, this time ive got hostages, my hostages, hostages of my mind and body, cant let them go, thats all i have left of you but that is all that i dont want to know of you. i want to scream out loud, anything to make me feel better, safer, stronger, believer, yes i dont believe in relationships, they are not for me and i not for them. its too painful, mind cant decipher my feelings anymore, too powerful too many, what to do? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? oh please let me be, please let me be, dont bother me anymore i cant sing this ridiculous riddle anymore because there is nothing, and i cant think of you and me and this thing called relationship.