Randy Johnson

Randy Johnson Poems

601. I Give New Meaning To The Word Nerd 7/28/2007
602. Pepe Le Pew Raped My Cat 3/20/2008
603. I Don'T Need A Babysitter! 2/26/2008
604. Hot Dogs With Chili 12/29/2007
605. Late Again 12/30/2007
606. Life Isn'T Always Fair 12/5/2007
607. Illegal Alien 11/26/2007
608. George Washington 7/23/2008
609. World's Biggest Player 5/10/2009
610. My Wife Is A Slut 1/7/2009
611. Racist People Are Going To Vote For Obama 9/17/2008
612. Terminally Ill 9/13/2005
613. Everybody Loved Tom Bosley 10/20/2010
614. Paddling Bully 8/28/2006
615. Going Berserk Over A Playstation 3 11/17/2006
616. Honor Thy Parents 12/15/2010
617. Alvin And The Chipmunks 12/15/2007
618. Hippocratic Oath 3/20/2012
619. Gift From God 12/9/2010
620. Streets Of Gold 11/27/2010
621. Ambulance Sirens 4/15/2007
622. Worship God 7/9/2007
623. He Ate Dog Food 11/22/2006
624. Your Dog Is Humping My Leg 12/16/2008
625. Ida 7/6/2008
626. Valentine 2/14/2008
627. The Apple Of God's Eye 12/23/2007
628. Electric Chair 1/10/2008
629. A Cop's Revenge 3/1/2008
630. Vegetarian 1/19/2008
631. God Loves Everybody 7/5/2007
632. Returning Food 4/26/2008
633. Neglectful Father 3/28/2008
634. Large Breasts 1/2/2010
635. Faith In The Lord 12/11/2007
636. If You Want To Succeed 3/27/2008
637. I Love Boobs 10/22/2009
638. 40 Days And 40 Nights 11/6/2007
639. Selena 4/25/2007
640. Whooped By A Kindergartner 9/16/2005

Comments about Randy Johnson

  • Sasha Anonymous (9/6/2007 7:16:00 AM)

    Marvelous writing... ^_^

    2 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Emily =) (4/6/2007 10:13:00 AM)

    I love all of your poems they are filled with humor and sadness, light hearted and serious-brilliant.

    2 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Buried Alive (12/24/2006 7:36:00 PM)

    I found 'I had sex with my mother-in-law' to be the funniest one I read.I was
    laughing my head off. I wonder if you will be writing a second part to it.

    2 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Jeff Hobbs Jeff Hobbs (7/24/2006 7:55:00 AM)

    Loved the crammed things up your ass poem - I thought it was going to suck a pineapple, instead it inserted one! Very funny, very very funny. You should allow comments on your poems so that you can bathe in the glory!

    2 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Untitiled and unnamed (6/29/2006 9:53:00 PM)

    X Ray Glasses,

    Hey I really liked this, such a fun poem, something I am sure all teenage boys

    wished they had, had at one time or another...

    0 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
Best Poem of Randy Johnson

A Date With Pamela Anderson

I met Pamela Anderson and we went on a date.
She was very becoming and everything went great.
It was an honor to date this star.
I made her forget about Tommy Lee and it wasn't hard.

When I first asked her out, she decided to resist.
But at the end of our date she and I kissed.
As I popped the question, I got down on one knee and begged.
And you're most likely aware that I'm pulling your leg.

Read the full of A Date With Pamela Anderson

Yellow Pocket Bike

I love cruising on my yellow pocket bike.
As I ride down the road, I love what it feels like.
It has a semi-automatic transmission with four gears.
The sound of its engine is music to my ears.
My bike is small but it has 70 CCs of power.
It will go up to fifty miles per hour.
But I never go fast.
I treat this bike like a baby because I want it to last.
Parents should exercise caution because these bikes aren't toys.