Randy Johnson


Randy Johnson Poems

1. A 2nd Poem About Hoss 9/9/2005
2. 4th Of July 9/4/2005
3. We Have To Talk 9/5/2005
4. Sylvester 9/5/2005
5. Let's Step Outside 9/5/2005
6. Respect 9/5/2005
7. Twister 9/10/2005
8. Agnes 9/10/2005
9. Toothless 9/17/2005
10. Yellow Pocket Bike 9/3/2005
11. Attacked 9/3/2005
12. I'M No Superhero 9/15/2005
13. Home Improvement 9/18/2005
14. My Crappy Go Cart 9/20/2005
15. Rain & Thunderstorms 7/6/2006
16. I Got A Lickin For Eating A Chicken 7/18/2006
17. Liars! 9/3/2006
18. He Ate All Of The Doughnuts 9/18/2006
19. You Should Be Put In Your Place 10/10/2006
20. Turns To Gold 10/30/2006
21. Superficial 11/1/2006
22. Farewell Jack Palance 11/16/2006
23. Records 12/5/2006
24. Norman Part 3 12/16/2006
25. Ford 12/28/2006
26. She Poured My Beers Down The Drain 12/29/2006
27. End Of 2006 12/31/2006
28. Child Beater 1/3/2007
29. Picking Up Women 1/5/2007
30. Our Vows Meant Nothing To Her 1/10/2007
31. Don'T Have The Special! 1/27/2007
32. Heaven 2/6/2007
33. Anna Nicole 2/9/2007
34. Farley Forever 3/31/2007
35. P.O.W. 4/9/2007
36. Incompetent Doctor 9/20/2005
37. Sent To Prison 4/15/2006
38. You Killed My Son's Cat 5/1/2007
39. Swastika 5/6/2007
40. Sometimes I Feel Like Screaming 6/8/2007

Comments about Randy Johnson

  • Mr. Z (1/29/2020 11:09:00 PM)

    How can I get your background mr. Johnson

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  • acsaacac (1/27/2020 6:58:00 AM)

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  • Rahman Henry Rahman Henry (8/28/2019 10:02:00 AM)

    ‘‘Elvice Presley: The Same Amount of Time‘’: I love Elvice and his town Memphis; and now through this poem, I love you too. I've translated this poem into Bengali, so that my people can enjoy your poetic feelings for Alvice in their mother language. Best wishes, dear poet.

    0 person liked.
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  • Michael C (5/20/2019 4:49:00 PM)

    Garfield by Randy Johnson can only be described as a modern masterpiece. Despite being written in 2007 I can still call it a modern masterpiece for its beauty transcends time itself. As I go through my life I will look back to the fondness that is Garfield the poem.

    1 person liked.
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  • Chuy Amante Chuy Amante (12/3/2017 8:39:00 PM)

    Very fun stuff! ! ! ! !

    I think of nutty titles too and on occassion write about them.
    You do it so freely and well! !

    2 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Gene Gamble (1/26/2009 9:22:00 PM)

    God wants us to be happy: In this poem your route to heaven in theology & Truth is in error. There was a price that was paid and it is a choice. Not of works. Read John 3: 16 again. Make what one is accountable for, not of misleading in the teachings of the Gospel message. Let the Spirit guide you. God bless.

    5 person liked.
    5 person did not like.
  • Native Dreamer (1/7/2009 5:04:00 PM)

    'I told you I was sick' words written on the great comedian Spike Milligans headstone. Humours a great force of social change keep it up. Maybe if you did it on the streets you might get loose change. Dont be crude cause it might turn nude I speak in rhyme all the time. This comment is dragging on sorry keep on enjoying writing.

    4 person liked.
    2 person did not like.
  • Corey Threet (6/13/2008 8:48:00 PM)

    You have some very humorous poems I love your style unfortunately Frozen tongue was not fictional in my lol thnx for the entrainment

    2 person liked.
    5 person did not like.
  • Tyease Collins Tyease Collins (5/29/2008 7:31:00 PM)

    'He looka lika man' Hilarious show and poem. That was too priceless.

    nice

    2 person liked.
    6 person did not like.
  • unknown Viper (1/2/2008 6:34:00 PM)

    on'Loch Ness monster raped me'. very funny...maybe to propagate its specie :)

    2 person liked.
    3 person did not like.
Best Poem of Randy Johnson

A Date With Pamela Anderson

I met Pamela Anderson and we went on a date.
She was very becoming and everything went great.
It was an honor to date this star.
I made her forget about Tommy Lee and it wasn't hard.

When I first asked her out, she decided to resist.
But at the end of our date she and I kissed.
As I popped the question, I got down on one knee and begged.
And you're most likely aware that I'm pulling your leg.

Read the full of A Date With Pamela Anderson

My Grandpa

(Dedicated to Burkette Greene who passed away February 7,1998.)


He cherished everyday of his life.
He was a casual man with five kids and a wife.
Sadly his wife died and left him on his own.
He then raised his kids and he did it all alone.

He was eighty-seven when he passed away.